Sidrak and Bokkus: 415 Medieval Questions

A traditional high-effort medieval post from Skerples? Is it 2017?

Sidrak and Bokkus is a Middle English verse adaptation of an Old French prose book of knowledge, cast in question-and-answer form, enclosed within a framing adventure story. Its astonishing contemporary popularity is shown by the number and distribution of surviving manuscripts (several dozen in French; seven in English, excluding fragments; others in Italian, Danish, and Dutch [...] and the subtitle found in many of the French versions, ‘La fontaine de toutes sciences’, bears witness to its alleged authority. In spite of the work’s obvious importance in the history of European thought, as an index of popular attitudes and beliefs in the Middle Ages (it covers just about everything from the visibility of the Deity and the power of devils to the cause of leprosy and the copulation of dogs - questions 2, 7, 65, 102), there is no published critical edition of the French original or of the English translation.

-T.L. Burton, Sidrak and Bokkus

I was vaguely aware of Sidrac's existence in French, but had never read it, and wasn't aware of the Middle English versions at all until Dan D's recent post on Throne of Salt. 

It's well worth a read. Middle English is very readable if you treat it as a vocabulary and spelling puzzle. The answers range from thoughtful and correct to absolutely bonkers (by modern standards, and occasionally by 13th century standards). The Maniculum podcast has a few highlights.

Q. 102 Why are dogs more tightly joined during copulation than other animals?
A: Hounds are hot of nature, which welds them together like hot iron.

Sidrak and Bokkus is a book of questions and answers, presented less as a Socratic dialogue and more of a firehose of facts. The framing story is a magical adventure narrative, purportedly of pre-Christian kings and schemes. The author, Sidrac, is supposedly divinely inspired and has Noah's book of astronomy, which lets him predict future events.

 It's... not great poetry. It's not deep philosophy. It's not even cutting-edge 13th century reasoning.

But if Sidrac is so awful, why was it so popular? Or, to reverse the question, if it was so popular, why do most critics think it is so bad? (Holler is exceptional in considering that the answers ‘radiate wisdom’: ‘Ordinary Man’, p. 537.) Popularity is, of course, no guarantee of quality; but I do not think this is a sufficient answer. Part of the problem stems from the false expectations of present-day readers. Critics who complain of a lack of order and lack of indexing assume that Sidrac is intended as a reference work of the kind we are used to today, of which the encyclopaedias of Vincent and Bartholomew are medieval equivalents. Those who dwell on its lack of originality assume that its purpose is to record the latest developments in scientific research; those who are troubled by the generic mixture expect it to be either an adventure story or a book of knowledge, not both.

But Sidrac is evidently intended not as a journal of scientific research or a systematic encyclopaedia or a simple thriller: it is rather ‘a kind of non-alphabetical encyclopaedia in the vernacular, in which everything gets mentioned somewhere’; the educational level of its intended audience is evidently low; and some repetition [...] and some inconsistencies (as between the answers to questions 34 and 287) are perhaps inevitable. It belongs, in short, to that class of sugared information transfer that has today come to be called (especially as applied to television programmes) ‘infotainment’. Perhaps the worst that can be said of it in this light is that it aims low—and hits the target.

-T.L. Burton, Sidrak and Bokkus

Sidrak and Bokkus sits in a genre filled in our era by the Guinness Book of World Records, the Dangerous Book for Boys / Daring Book for Girls, and the Big Book of Bible Questions... with all that that implies about its quality and theirs.

It's something to keep precocious youngsters or bothersome parishioners occupied. It answers common questions with authority. Thinking about how you'd answer the questions, and arguing with friends (in the traditional pub manner) is just as important as the answers in the text. It's not a serious book for serious people, and it never was.

Q. 361: What is the greenest thing of all?
A: Water, because things underwater appear green, and it makes plants grow.

De-Indexing Sidrak and Bokkus

T.L. Burton's critical edition doesn't have a modern English table of contents, only the Middle English version. I reverse-engineered a question list from Burton's index.

This spreadsheet has 3 tabs: my categorized questions (also given below), the questions in the order they appear in the text, and the original index. 

The categories I selected are arbitrary, but their original order is fairly arbitrary as well. Footnotes are in brackets.

Question #	Category
I’m Pretty Sure This Is In The Catechism, But I’d Have To Check
1	Has God always existed?
2	Is God visible?
3	Is God everywhere? Do all creatures feel God's presence?
12	Did Adam do any other sin apart from breaking God’s commandment?
13	What did Adam take from God and how will he repay it?
14	Why was Adam not damned forever for his sin?
15	Why did God not send an angel or a man to redeem Adam?
16	Why will God be born of a maiden?
28	How may it be known that God made humans for the bliss of heaven / in his image?
38	Is God generous to those who serve him faithfully?
45	What power did God give the soul?
58	May the wicked have God’s love as the good may?
66	Did God create all things at the beginning?
73	How long will the world last?
95	Is it wrong to swear by one's god?
115	Why did God make this world?
119	Why will God destroy the world’s people?
133	Will there be another flood [like Noah's]?
197	Does God cheerfully forgive all one’s sins?
206	Is God angered by one's death, good or evil?
216	Will those who teach good here receive extra grace hereafter?
233	What is heavenly paradise?
253	Who will have more bliss in heaven: innocent children or people who knowingly choose good?
275	Can one go to heaven without first going to purgatory?
283	What will become of those who will die at the doom and who have earned neither heaven nor hell?
290	Who named all things and taught them their ‘cunning’ (= knowledge) / their powers?
305	Will those born dumb or foolish be damned if they do wrong?
312	What is hell and how do souls go there?
314	Do the good who go to heaven enter at once into perfect joy?
363	Which is better on one’s deathbed: repentance or hope of eternal bliss?
366	Should one say anything before lying down to sleep?
375	Which is more help to the soul: what one does oneself before death or what others do for one afterwards?
Difficult Questions Your Child Will Ask At Inconvenient Times
23	How does a bodiless soul feel pleasure or pain?
35	Is there any excuse for those who know nothing of God?
277	Will children too young to reason be damned?
200	Do one’s good works come from God or from oneself?
279	Will the children of heathens be damned?
43	Will the souls of the good be grieved by the torments of the damned?
Big Rashi Energy [2]
4	What was the first thing God made?
5	When were angels made?
6	What purposes do [the various orders of] angels serve?
8	What shape are angels? What do they know? What can they do?
9	Did God make man with his hand(s)?
10	Where did God make Adam?
11	Where did Adam go after leaving paradise?
17	How long did Adam live on earth?
94	How were tongs, hammer, and anvil first made?
132	Were hills and rocks made when the world was created?
134	Why did Noah take evil animals (scorpions, adders, and snakes) onto the ark?
158	How many angels did God create? How many remain in heaven? How many fell?
255	How long after Lucifer’s fall was Adam created?
273	Is the soul heavy or light, big or small, dark or bright?
280	If Adam had not sinned, would his descendants have remained in paradise?
281	When water [of the flood] covered the world, did it cover paradise?
282	What age was Adam when created?
285	Which did God make first: the soul or the body?
301	What kind of apple did Adam eat?
317	When God created trees, was there fruit on them?
320	Did God create new fruit after the flood?
321	Where did Noah's ark land when the flood abated?
322	Did Noah come into this world as a stranger when he left the ark?
401	Will heaven’s inhabitants be clothed or naked?
This Is Not Medical Advice
19	Does God send anything to foretell the manner of one’s death?
26	Why does the soul not remain in the body when the blood is lost?
30	What becomes of the blood when people die?
32	Why does the body not die when half its blood is lost?
33	Of what ‘complexion’ and nature is the body?
55	Why did God not will that one meal a week should be sufficient?
59	How may a child come out of its mother's womb?
60	Can a woman carry more than one child in her womb at one time?
64	Whence come hardiness and fear?
65	Whence come leprosy and scall?
76	Whence comes ‘felony’ (rage)?
80	Which gives greater ‘cunning’ (= intelligence): hot food or cold?
81	How can ‘felony’ (rage?), wrath, and melancholy be avoided?
85	Whence comes the fatness of the body?
108	How can people become fools?
112	Can a leper be cured of leprosy?
176	Why do people(’s eyes) sometimes weep easily?
185	How can a fully-formed child be stillborn?
208	Why was sleep made?
218	Whence comes the ‘wicked evil’ (epilepsy) that causes people to fall?
221	How is a man sometimes ‘jolly’?
222	Can a man beget a child every time he touches his wife?
223	What is a man’s semen and how is it formed?
240	Whence comes quaking in humans?
246	What is the wholesomest meat to eat?
247	How is food distributed in the body?
248	How should one remove a bone or thorn stuck in the throat?
249	Why do faeces stink?
250	Why is urine salt?
251	How are worms bred in the body and on what do they feed?
261	How is a child nourished in a woman's womb?
265	How may the young be grey-haired before the old?
266	Whence comes baldness?
291	Why are some people taller than others?
292	Which is more perilous: heat or cold?
302	Why are some people born deaf and dumb?
306	How do children learn more than the old?
326	Which is better to drink: wine or water?
330	Is it wholesome to eat whatever one can get?
333	Why are new-born children more helpless than animals?
335	Whence comes sneezing?
340	Why do some have a quick, easy death, others a long, slow one?
359	Whence comes the sweat of the body?
367	Why cannot young men produce strong children as old men do?
370	How does a child lie in its mother's womb?
This Had Better Not Be A Riddle or Pun, And If You Say "Marry Nuncle..." I'm Going To Be Angry
18	Why is death so named?
61	What is the best thing one can have?
62	What is the worst thing one can have?
77	Why are all animals not the same colour?
79	What is our best and worst thing?
105	Is it good to answer fools?
155	Of which are there more: grains of earth or water drops?
156	Can grains of earth / hairs or water drops be counted?
160	What is the most delightful place in the world?
161	Who is the hardier: a day-time or a night-time traveller?
162	Whose courage is the greater: a townsman’s or a countryman’s?
184	How could one be born without a father or mother?
207	What is the worthiest day of the year?
212	Are there any worldly goods that one can take anywhere without injury?
215	How many times is one forsworn if one makes ten false oaths at once?
220	What is the safest and most perilous craft?
229	How do the old sleep like young children?
242	How can one speak to oneself? How can someone speaking alone say “we”?
257	How can the wind be felt but not seen?
258	How can a fire be made but not held?
284	Why is the soul invisible?
293	Who are the most contented people and the most free from misery?
297	Which should be wiser: the old or the young?
339	Which is the stronger: wind or water?
368	What is the hardest/worst battle to fight?
This Is Not Political Advice
49	How should lordship be exercised?
169	If two hosts (= armies) meet, should they attack each other?
205	Will there always be war and strife in the world?
210	What people do most to sustain the world?
211	Which is greater: the king or the law?
303	Do people profit by their almsdeeds?
357	Of what behaviour and virtue ought kings and lords to be?
358	Should kings and lords appear personally in battle?
Luigi's Mansion
56	Do the rich die (easily) like the poor?
57	Should the rich be judged in  the same way as the poor?
89	Can one have profit without work?
92	Are the rich less worthy for losing  wealth or the poor worthier for gaining it?
98	Which is better: wealth or poverty?
99	Should rich and poor be honoured equally?
104	Can one escape death through wealth or other means?
107	Why can some people not stop working for profit?
179	Should the poor put themselves before the rich?
191	Are the rich honoured and the poor despised in the other world as in this?
193	Do killers assume responsibility for their victims’ sins?
198	Why do some people work so hard?
252	What crafts(men) might we worst do without?
304	Do judges sin in passing judgement, or executioners in carrying it out?
345	Which is worthier: wealth or poverty?
I Think The Answer Is Obvious But I'm Worried About What The Text Will Say
44	Which is better: health or sickness?
50	Should one do good to one’s kin and friends?
78	Do those who eat and drink more than is necessary do good or evil?
82	Which ‘is more bate’ (opp. of 'debate', therefore 'correct'?): to love or to hate women?
86	Should men chastise women physically when they do wrong?
88	Should one love one’s friend and try to hold him?
90	Should people do good and almsdeeds for the needy poor?
100	Do the poor delight in poverty as the rich do in their wealth?
103	Is a man wrong to covet another’s wife or goods?
165	Should one forget another who has served one well?
166	Can a man desist from lechery with a woman in his power whom he desires / resist the advances of a woman who desires him?
180	Is it a sin to eat everything one can get?
181	Should people greet one another whenever they meet?
189	Should one love all people?
196	Which is the worst of the three: murder, theft, or brawling?
227	Which is higher: land or sea?
295	Should one help one’s friend or neighbour?
325	Should one take pity on those in pain or sorrow and assist them if one can?
329	Should one visit one’s friend frequently?
347	Should one love and keep company with those who speak evil?
364	Should one weep for someone/a friend who has died?
398	Are more born into the world daily than die, or vice versa?
This Feels Like A Trap
36	Should people do anything other than God’s commandments?
70	Does God feed everything that he made on earth?
93	Whence come people’s wicked customs?
97	Whose company should one love and whose avoid?
101	Should one boast of anything one does?
110	Whose company should one prefer: that of the old or that of the young?
114	Is it good to have dealings with all people?
164	Should one honour all people and try to do their will?
175	Should people worship God constantly?
177	What kinds of people should be honoured?
190	Are all people in the world alike / like-minded?
195	Are there people who eat and drink anything unnatural?
296	Which is better: speech or silence?
331	Who are the greatest boasters?
344	Should one conduct oneself vigorously/fiercely towards one’s enemy?
350	If asked a question, should one respond immediately?
352	Which is the seemlier: ‘fair’ face or ‘fair’ body?
372	Should the wise reveal their thought to fools?
I Fucking Love Astronomy
46	Will any astronomer remain as a teacher after Christ’s ascent into heaven?
106	Which is the most difficult ‘cunning’ (= branch of learning) to acquire?
116	How was the world made and how is it held in place?
117	Are there other people apart from us who have the sun’s light?
118	How long, broad, and thick is the world?
139	Is it possible to sail to the edge of the sky?
144	Whence come eclipses of the moon and sun?
145	How do stars fall and what becomes of them?
146	How many heavens are there?
147	How high above earth is heaven?
148	What power does the sky have?
149	What are the names and powers of the planets?
152	Why did God make the world round as a ball?
153	Why is the moon cold and the sun hot?
157	How many stars are there in the sky?
201	Where does the day hide from the night and vice versa?
202	How are the planets held aloft in the sky?
203	How can one tell the time of day or night?
204	Do all the stars revolve in the sky?
225	Are enchantments and sorcery efficacious?
237	Why can the new moon not be seen until it is in the east/west?
267	What signs does each planet have, and of what ‘complexion’ is each sign?
Philosophy 101 Students Pass The Bong Around
27	How/Why do people die?
29	Why may humans not do as God did?
48	Does one sin if one does not actively do good [or evil]?
53	Is it possible to tell good people from wicked?
63	How can one be faithful and true?
68	How do animals (lacking reason) become enraged?
113	Why did God not make us incapable of sin?
140	Why did God not make us eternally youthful, vigorous, powerful, etc.?
154	What is the greatest (‘most’) thing there is?
172	In what language does a deaf mute think?
174	Can any creature that God made know his thought?
194	Which causes the greater sorrow: what is heard or what is seen?
199	What is the darkest thing there is?
217	Whence comes thought?
230	If God had made us as big as the world would we have had power like God’s?
231	What would the world have been like if God had not made it as it is?
254	How may one overcome the will of the world?
298	What (kind of thing) is delight?
323	Whence comes human pity?
324	Do those who love delight and rest do worst or best?
334	Whence comes our native wit?
354	Should one blame God for one's troubles?
355	Should one serve all other people as best one can?
Eternal Reddit Advice Threads
84	How can a man love a woman blamelessly and vice versa?
87	What is jealousy and why are people sometimes jealous?
91	How should one conduct oneself in company / without fierceness?
163	Should a man upbraid another for the defects of his wife?
168	Should a man take delight with a woman?
182	How should one teach one’s children to please one?
183	Whom should a man love more: his wife or his children?
186	Are all women in the world alike?
187	Should a man alert his friend to his wife’s misconduct?
192	Is a father held responsible for his son's faults and vice versa?
209	What is the wholesomest place in the world?
213	Can two who have loved strongly resume their friendship after a separation?
214	How can a man love a woman at first sight and vice versa?
224	Is one bound to love one’s children and do good for them?
238	Should one tell one’s secrets to one’s friend?
244	Whose child should one love more: one’s sister’s or one’s brother’s?
262	Should a man upbraid his wife publicly if she does wrong?
263	Is it good for a man to be jealous of his wife?
264	Should one believe the good or ill that one thinks of another?
294	Is a child harmed by the wickedness of its father or mother?
327	How may one desist from fighting when one is roused?
328	Why do women have all the sorrow and joy of the world?
346	Should someone living in a good place search for a better?
348	Can one forget one’s native country?
351	Should one desist from asking for one's debts?
353	How should a man behave if he finds his wife having an affair?
360	Which are the best colours of clothing to wear?
371	How should one plead one’s cause before a judge in a lawcourt?
Obviously The Penis [2]
41	What is the blissfullest, worthiest, and ‘fairest’ thing?
42	What is the foulest, most perilous, and most accursed thing?
167	What is the greatest delight there is?
170	Which members (= body parts) might one worst do without?
219	Which is the most perilous organ in the body?
234	What is the ‘fairest’ thing God made?
245	What is the most perilous thing in us?
256	Which is the ‘fairest’ organ in the body, and why?
299	What is the most delightful/pleasantest sight there could be?
356	What is the most delightful thing there is?
362	What is the ‘fairest’ thing there is?
Worryingly Vague
47	Who will be its keeper and commander?
188	Should one hasten to do a thing?
235	Whom should we love more: those who love us or those we love now?
342	How should one (best) live in this world?
343	Should one fear one’s enemy?
Worryingly Specific
51	What is ‘Gentilnesse’?
102	Why are dogs more tightly joined during copulation than other animals?
226	What animals are ‘wightest/ wittiest’ and ‘most of savour’?
228	Whence come snails and why do they keep to the earth/grass?
300	Why did God put hair on the body?
308	How may angels (lacking a body) appear to humans?
315	Can souls appear to their friends whenever they want?
336	Which ‘elements’ could we best do without?
338	Why do birds not reproduce viviparously, like animals?
361	What is the greenest thing of all?
376	Do fish sleep?
Not Exactly Sex-Positive
96	Should one be chaste in body?
142	Which is better: good works without chastity or chastity with wicked deeds?
239	Which women give men most delight and benefit?
259	Which is worthier: maidenhood or virginity?
260	Which is capable of the greater lechery: man or woman, and why?
Pub Trivia Night [3]
69	What animal lives longest?
135	Whence comes gold?
136	Whence come carbuncles/ pearls and other precious stones?
137	How many lands are there in the world?
138	Is it possible to traverse the world on dry land?
150	How many kinds of waters are there?
151	How many seas are there?
159	Of which are there most: animals, humans, birds, or fish?
171	Who made the first (musical) instrument, and how did he think of it?
178	Who is the most generous person in the world?
236	What are the three worthiest things / worthiest words, grasses, and stones?
243	Can the sea be diminished by loss of water?
318	On what day and at what time was Adam created?
319	Who discovered wine?
377	What is the ‘fairest’ bird there is?
378	What is the ‘fairest’ animal there is?
379	Which are the ‘fairest’ horses (and the best to ride)?
380	Which animals have most understanding?
I Could Probably Explain This Scientifically To A Child But I Might Get Confused Midway
67	Who feeds the fruits of the earth?
120	How are birds held aloft in the air?
173	Why are some clouds white and some black?
143	What is the cause of earthquakes?
121	Whence comes rain?
122	Whence comes hail?
123	Whence come tempests?
124	Whence comes thunder?
125	Whence comes the wind?
126	How does water issue from hillsides?
127	Why is sea-water salt?
128	How does hot water spring out of the earth?
129	Whence comes brimstone?
130	Whence comes lightning?
131	Whence come and whither go waters that ebb and flow?
373	Why are some wines white and some red?
316	How do dreams appear to our sight?
31	What becomes of fire when it goes out?
241	Does the eye give, or receive, in seeing?
75	Why are some people black, some white, and some brown?
111	Why does it rain more in some years than in others?
52	How can it be cold in fair weather?
332	Why are clouds less thick in summer than in winter?
337	Why does a strong wind die for a shower of rain?
D&D Arguments
349	Which is better: sleight or strength?
374	Do birds and animals have language or understanding?
71	Do fish, birds, and animals have souls?
37	How many worlds are there and what are they called?
74	Do any other people live in the world apart from us?
Asking For A Friend
7	Do devils know everything and can they do everything?
309	Do devils spy constantly on our misdeeds?
365	Has anything/anyone ever brought tidings of heaven or hell?
313	Do hell’s inhabitants know anything?
270	Can the dead return to this world?
83	How can a young, healthy man’s wrath be aroused for a small cause?
310	What is (the fire of) purgatory like?
Reliant On A Soul-Based Paradigm
20	How does the soul go to the other world when it leaves the body?
21	Which was made first: the soul or the body?
22	Which speaks: the soul or the body?
24	Which has the dominance: the soul or the body?
25	Where in us does the soul live?
34	Were all souls made at the Creation, or are they still being made? (see also Q. 287)
109	Is the soul or the body sorrowful when they must part?
141	Which are the angels that receive one’s soul into bliss?
232	Did angels come from God’s breath like Adam’s soul?
268	How do good souls go to heaven and wicked to hell?
269	Is the good angel grieved when people commit sin?
271	Will those who go to hell or paradise ever come out?
272	Why don’t good souls go to the earthly paradise?
274	Where do good souls go when they leave the body?
286	Is the soul engendered naturally, like the body?
287	Were all souls made at the Creation, or are they still being made? (see also Q. 34)
288	When the soul comes to the body, how does it enter?
289	How does the soul of a dead foetus escape from the womb of its dead mother?
307	Do angels look after our souls?
311	How many souls will go to heaven when the world ends?
341	Which feels the sorrow on parting: the soul or the body?
399	Will heaven’s inhabitants have no end and no sorrow?
400	Will hell's inhabitants never have mercy or rest?
It Doesn't Count As A Prophecy If It Already Happened
39	Will Christ’s contemporaries and those who live afterwards believe in him?
40	What commandment will he give his people?
54	Will faith in idols ever again be as strong as it was in Bokkus’s time?
72	Will Christ’s contemporaries live as long as we do?
381	When [Christ] will be born, by what token will it be seen?
382	What will these tokens signify?
383	When he is born, will he be more knowledgeable than others?
384	When he is born, where will he live?
385	Will God's Son be a ‘fair’? man?
386	Why will he die?
387	Who will kill him? By whose advice? How long will he be dead?
388	Will he ascend into heaven unaccompanied?
389	Will God’s Son have a (castle or) house on earth?
390	Will his body remain visibly on earth?
391	Will everyone have the power to make his body?
392	Will those who have this power be honoured more than others?
393	(Why) will they be bound to make his body daily?
394	What is sin that we will be born into?
395	What sign will announce his death?
396	What power will he have when he is on earth?
397	Will Christ’s disciples perform miracles as he will?
It Doesn't Count As A Prophecy If You Copy Someone Else's Prophecy
276	Where will the doom be held and who will be judged?
278	Will there be any house, town, or city in the other world?
369	Will everyone born into this world leave it by death?
402	What people will be alive at the Last Judgement?
403	Where will Antichrist be born?
404	On what day will God’s Son judge us?
405	At what time will he come to judge the world?
406	In what manner will he come to judge us?
407	Will his Cross be present at the Judgement?
408	How will he appear to the people to be judged?
409	Will his ministers be with him to witness the Judgement?
410	How will he carry out the doom and what will he say?
411	Will everyone’s doings here then be revealed to all?
412	What will happen after the doom?
413	What will become of this world after the Last Judgement?
414	Will the good then still live here to do whatever they want?
415	Will they then remember the wicked things they did here?

[1] I rate Sidrak and Bokkus 5 centiRashis (the SI unit of Surprising Commentary). Most of the answers are less interesting than you might expect. The doggerel Middle English rhyme scheme doesn't help.

[2] I am 100% certain that "hur hur hur, the penis" was the intended amusing first thought / social answer for some, if not most, of these questions. This isn't a work of high philosophy. (See Q. 239).

[3] Try some of these questions out next time you're asked to make a quiz. I'm sure they won't cause any arguments. Or, if you're willing to translate Middle English on the fly, quiz your friends and compare their answers to the canonical ones.

Q. 266: Whence comes baldness?
A: Astrology. Men born under Leo are of hot complexion, and think harder than other men, which causes their hair to lessen.

Gameable Content

You can use these questions like Dr. Zahir's Ethnographical Questionnaire or other worldbuilding tools. Some of them rely on certain religious/societal conditions, but some are general, and will be asked by people in any society.

They're also great for pub quizzes, interrogating children (the answers are usually amusing), and starting conversations... or, as is more likely the case, ending them.