OSR: Pre-Apocalyptic Minor Magical Items

Just a little update post.

Not all magical innovations are potentially world-changing. The full book will contain 1d100 minor magic items split into 5 categories of 20 (to allow multiple rollning  Here's a sample of 10.

Item cost and availability varies based on the Tempo (the general pace of life and scope of magical advancement).

[  ] 30gp, and are available only from the original inventors, specialist stores, or public displays. They are novel and exciting.
[  ] [  ] 10gp, and are available at specialized stores and from roving street vendors. 
[  ] [  ] [  ] 5gp, and are widely available. Used versions of some items may be available for 2gp (25% chance of not working).

The items are designed to promote item-based problem solving. You might have a sword, but I have a sword and an air compressor.

When I was about 16 I joined in partnership with a man who used to make phosphorus boxes. I sold them for him. A piece of phosphorus was stuck in a tin tube, the match was dipped into the phosphorus, and it would ignite by friction. I was hawking these boxes in Norwich, when the constable considered they were dreadful affairs, and calculated to encourage and assist thieves and burglars. He took me before the magistrate, at the beak’s own private house, and he being equally horrified, I was sent to prison for a month. I have often thought since that the proceeding was illegal. What would be said now if a man was to be sent to jail for selling lucifer matches? 
-Henry Mayhew, London Labour and the London Poor, Volume 1
Travis Louie

1d10 Example Minor Magic Items
1 Liquified Light. Sold in mirrored flasks stoppered with lead. Crack open and pour out 1 hr of glowing yellow-white liquid. All the colours of sunset available.  
2 Fireman’s Gloves. Thick black leather. Put them both on and faintly glowing red hands appear exactly 10’ in front of you. They move as your hands move, same size and strength. 
3 Air Compressor. Iron cart, spinning stone wheel, hose. Can provide 1hr of reasonably high-pressure air per day. 1-in-100 chance of exploding noisily. 
4 Thumbspark Jelly. Thimble-sized flask. Glows orange. Rub it on your thumb and finger, then snap. Little burst of flame, like a match. Works 10 times on any high-friction joint. 
5 Portable Orchestra. Simple wood keyboard with multiple add-in slots. Can play one instrument per slot. Tinny, distorted. Generally considered a nuisance. 
6 Self-Cleaning Pot. Just add soap and water, tap the brass plate on the front, and it scrubs itself clean. Just don’t tap the plate while food is inside (or your hand). It scrubs vigorously.  
7 Wake-Me-Up. Glass vial containing green fog. Inhale to instantly banish fatigue for 1d6 hours. Pleasant mania for a few minutes. Not addictive. Usually taken in the morning.
8 Ultragrease. Very small pot. Could coat an bowling ball or a coffee table. Lasts 1d20hrs. Object is temporarily nearly frictionless. Too expensive/unstable for widespread industrial use.
9 Sealing Bubble. Blue rubbery sphere. Failed magic raincoat. Throw it hard and it coats a single room (up to 50’x50’x50’) in a thin rubber layer. Seals furniture to walls, covers windows.
10 Bottled Fog. Glass bottle wrapped in wire. Highly compressed. Can fill an entire house or street with dense yellow-grey mist. 10’ visibility. Mist dissipates in 10 minutes. 


OSR: One Page Dungeon: Sutter Cane's Perilous Peninsula

Here's a quick little trope-filled adventure location. Happy Halloween!

Sutter Cane's Perilous Peninsula

I think this adventure works best as a funnel or as a place the PCs collide with on a cold fall night. There's no overarching plot. Just listen to the wild speculations of your players, nod, and make notes. 

Isaac Williams turned up to save the day with some excellent art. The old version is still available. Go check out his website. It has flash games.

Fonts are Creepy Crawlers and Insomnia.


OSR: The Angelic Amelia Bedelia

Gee, I  haven't done a clickbait title in a while...

Amelia Bedelia is a character from a children's book series. She's a maid. A very literal maid. Ask her to get the spots out of your dress and she'll grab the scissors. Ask her to take a seat and she'll pick up the chair. Ask her to dust the furniture and she'll carefully sprinkle dust over everything. Etc.

She's not malicious or deliberately obtuse. She's just... very straightforward, like a simple computer program. She's always confused as to why people want her to do these strange things, but it's her job, so she does whatever she's asked.

Amelia Bedelia is the opposite of a classic Faustian devil.

A devil wants to barter. Amelia Bedelia just listens and acts.
A devil wants whatever is precious to  you (up to and including your soul). Amelia Bedelia wants something completely free; your admiration and praise.
A devil is cunning and twists your words to suit its purpose. Amelia Bedelia is, bless her heart, a simple creature.
A devil will never help you unless it has to. It's sometimes difficult to prevent Amelia Bedelia from helping you.
Desperate people sometimes call up devils for assistance. People are usually desperate to get Amelia Bedelia to leave.

The conclusion is clear. Amelia Bedelia is a sort of angel. 

As such, it's only right and proper to inflict her on your PCs.

Angelica Carmelia

HD: 2
Appearance: a young woman with disordered brown hair, wearing locally appropriate but out-of-fashion servant's livery.
Voice: deliberately unaccented.

Wants: to help.
Morality: imperviously pious.
Intelligence: a sort of warped brilliance.
Armour: none.
Move: normal.
Morale: 12. Will only panic if people around her panic, just because it seems like the helpful thing to do.
Damage: none deliberately.

Angelica Carmelia is a prototype guardian angel. It didn't work. She's been sent to earth to help. She cannot deliberately be targeted by attacks, due to her angelic nature. Landslides will miss her (and only her).

She wants to help. She doesn't have any angelic powers (beyond sheer bloody-minded determination and supernatural good luck). Any domestic command will be obeyed. She'll strip sheets (tearing them into nice neat strips), chop firewood (into match sticks), and generally ruin everything. Any deliberately vulgar command will be met with a shocked look, a solid slap, and a great deal of trouble in the afterlife.

The only way to make her go away is to find someone who needs her help more than you do.

Example instructions:

"Check for traps": Angelica will put a check mark on four, but only four, traps. The fifth trap will be conveniently ignored.

"Attack that goblin." (not really a valid task but someone will ask). Angelica will throw a tack at the goblin.

"Hold this item." Angelica will hold the item like a small child or particularly passive cat until another command requires her to use her hands. She'll then put down the item and immediately forget about it.

"Tie this rope to that thing." Angelica will tie a knot: windsor, half windsor, or bow. None of the knots are particularly strong or suitable for adventuring purposes.

Do not trust the soup mimic.
Side Note: Wishes and Contracts
Any sensible genre-aware player, upon getting access to a Wish-type spell, is going to start drafting a fuckery-proof contract. No moneky's paw bullshit here, thank you very much.

And sometimes, that's fine, especially if the PC is both genre-aware and literate. But if they aren't... just mention to the player that their character might not be thinking things through with such care and deliberation.

In my experience the player usually runs with it. Sure, they could phrase every instruction to their new friend Angelica in perfectly clear and untwistable terms... but they could also not do that. And sometimes, it's deliciously fun to have a PC do things that the player knows full well are unwise.

Side Note 2: Angelica Carmelia is probably in the same divine order of beings as the Wyrms of Service, Mineral Wights, Restraining Ogres, etc.

Gygaxian Democracy: Amelia Bedelia spells.

This game is older than the internet. Pick a spell. Make it literal. Post it in the comments.

E.g. Find Familiar: target experiences a brief moment of déjà vu.
Fire Bolt: two objects are joined together by a large fastener made of flame.



OSR: More Magical Industrial Revolution Tidbits

The book I'm working on, Magical Industrial Revolution, will contain a number of Innovations. You can see the draft of one in this post.

Each Innovation has 6 Stages:

1. Initial Innovation
2. Public Introduction
3. Widespread Adoption
4. Scope Alteration
5. Height of Ambition
6. Terminal Events

Before each session*, the GM will roll 1d6 for each Innovation they wish to include in the campaign (which could be all of them). If the number rolled is equal to or higher than the current Stage, the Innovation advances to the next Stage.

E.g. The Innovation is at Stage 2. The DM rolls a 6; the Innovation advances to Stage 3. 

*or possibly at the start of The Season. I'm still working on downtime rules.

The Age of Power and Wonder


The sum of all the Stages in the game is equal to the Tempo. 
0-10: Tempo 1
11-24: Tempo 2

25+: Tempo 3

Numbers subject to adjustment during testing, of course. There will be a one-page printable tracking sheet.

Tempo is the general pace of life in the city of Endon, the general low-level magical chaos. It's not  tied to any one Innovation, but to all the minor, not-directly-apocalyptic changes to the city that take place as magical industry advances. It will affect the Random Encounter tables, locations, the price of goods and services, etc.

Example Location

1. The River Burl  
[   ] Brown, broad. Raw sewage reek. 3d10 muck-picking Urchins (pg. ##) in any given section. 
[   ] [   ] Slicks of glittering octarine dust. Urchins wear stilts or have leprous, mutated legs. 
[   ] [   ] [   ] All the reeds are dead. Thaumovoric Eels (pg. ##) glide at night, seeking concentrated magic.
Montgomery Thackeray, eel-seller and smuggler, phlemy voice, has a small boat. 
Grey Alice, fortune-teller and muck-raker fence. Sells dredged goods. Knows every recent corpse in the river by description, if not by name.

The [ ] are check boxes for the Tempo. I really want people to write all over this book. Check things off, draw lines, scrawl marginalia. Hopefully copies will be cheap enough, or I'll put on multiple editions, so that collectors can keep a pristine copy for reading and a "working" copy for games.

There will be 50 locations in this format; a convenient number for rolling at random.

Travis Chapman

Example Creature

There will also be a bestiary. Stats will use the same format as my other modules (most recently, The Mysterious Menagerie).

Thaumovoric Eel
In: the River Burl (pg. ##) [Tempo 3], the Curiosity Garden (pg. ##) [Tempo 2]. 

HD: 0 (3 HP)
Appearance: an iridescent slimy eel floating through air like water. Glass teeth.
Wants: to bite magical items and drain their power.
Armour: as leather.
Move: normal (flying)
Morale: 6
Damage: 1d4 bite
The eels will target magic items first, small children and pets second. On a hit, there's a 50% chance the eel drains a magic item of all magical properties and devour the spell inside. Roll a d6. On a 5, the spell is cast on the eel (adjust effects appropriately). On a 6, the eel simply explodes. Their flesh heals 1d6 HP.
Vladimir Malakhovskiy

So... isn't this just Eberron?

From a first glance, it might look like I'm reinventing the wheel. Magitech has been done, sure, but I'm not so sure it's been done like this.

Most settings are fixed, stable things. Institutions are sturdy. Technology is stagnant or predictable. Cities don’t change. A book lists the members of the council, the chief of police, the crime lords; a fixed portrait gallery.

This book isn’t about a setting’s end-point. It’s about a process. It’s the transition between two eras; a late renaissance world of castles, fields, and farmers, and an industrialized world of factories, cities, and power. Progress from one era to another will not be smooth, easy, or linear. The whole thing might explode, collapse, or veer towards madness. I'm trying to make every element of the book play into that sense of change, of turmoil, of things moving towards a tipping point.

So the book is about neither the start or the end of the process. It's about the chaotic change in the middle. It's not a setting. It's a... settling. Or maybe an unsettling.

(That might be a bit too trite, even for me.)


OSR: Pre-Apocalyptic Settings

More theorycrafting for my (possible) new book: Magical Industrial Revolution.
Isaac Yeram Kim
Post-apocalyptic settings - and by that, I mean settings where an apocalypse recently occurred, not ones that just carry an apocalypse or two in their histories - typically have:

Limited Scope

A typical post-apocalyptic story is intensely personal, focusing on just a handful of people, their interactions, and their struggles. Time progresses at a steady, slow, hour-by-hour pace; no jumps of years or decades.

Limited Resources

Ever scrap of food, every can of water, every bullet, bandage, and bottle cap is important. Or at least, some of them are; the world might be filled with  heaps of mostly useless garbage, but someone's still digging through them looking for tinned Spam. Commerce is rudimentary, mostly barter or straight-up theft. Banking is non-existent. Almost nothing new is being produced.

Limited Long-Term Planning

People with schemes are usually the bad guys. Anyone with a plan for the future, a grand vision, a dream for a new society, is more than likely the sort of person who also chews scenery and has a henchman named "Morg the Skullcrusha". Sure, sometimes, the good guys have a dream for a better world, but it's usually vague: overthrow the tyrant, liberate the camp, find a new land, etc. Plans with flowcharts and clear objectives are for villains.

Pragmatic Views

Everyone is practical; impractical people tend to die quickly. You might still get the odd poet, but almost everyone is too busy surviving to dream. The world is disillusioned; old ideas, old religions, old codes and morals have faded away, replaced by echoes or simply abandoned to time. Nobody really understands how things worked and nobody's trying to find out. Everyone is fairly sure they saw the apocalypse coming, or at least have a vague idea of what happened.

The Aesthetics of Ruin

Over and over again, these writers cast the PCs as tiny figures wandering a world of dead and dying titans, stumbling amidst the wreckage of mighty forces they do not understand.... But this is almost never because they're going up against a superior force operating at its full potential; instead, they're usually picking their way through the ruins of something so vast and powerful that even the random flailings of its last malfunctioning machines (or the dwarfish and degenerate descendants of its guard beasts, or the fragmentary and corrupted remnants of its arcane lore) are quite capable of smashing them to bits.
-Joseph Manola

Side Note: Apocalyptic literature - specifically, the prophetic biblical books - were, ironically, written for effectively post-apocalyptic people. They were written for people living under oppression, at the low point of power, growth, and ability. "Things will be better", the books say (through many layers of allusions). "This too shall pass. Evil will be cast down and good will triumph, and here's how."

So, in a pre-apocalyptic setting, the prophets aren't standing on street corners  holdings "The End Is Nigh" placards. The prophets are out in the wilderness, in the slums, in the colonies, in the world disrupted and trampled by the pre-apocalyptic culture. "It'll pass," they say to people the pre-apocalyptic culture barely cares about, "and here's how."

So, inverting the aspects above, a pre-apocalyptic setting could be said to have:

Wide Scope

The story deals with masses of people: cities, nations, civilizations. At a bare minimum, mobs and fashions should be involved somehow. The world should feel connected, large, confusing; things happen over the horizon.

Abundant Resources

Luxuries and innovations. Decadence. Maybe not for everyone, but compared to a post-apocalyptic world people have it pretty good. Large-scale food production, transportation, and distribution. Infra-structure, like infra-red, is too big to be seen with the naked eye. New technologies and new variations spring up like weeds.

Rampant Long-Term Planning

Everyone has a political stance, a plan for the future, a dream for how the world will work in a few years or decades or centuries. Abolish property. Abolish the French. Freedom, Justice, Liberty, Bread, and other Capital Letter Things are on everyone's lips. Society's heroes have grand plans, and people are generally excited to see how they turn out... or violently opposed, because they have plans of their own.

Impractical Views

People are much more willing to spend time, blood, and treasure on things that can't possibly work, are self-defeating, or are purely ornamental. In the pre-apocalyptic world, the frontiers of knowledge are constantly being explored. New theories and new systems constantly enter the public consciousness, possibly in a distorted form, but everyone can still blather on about them if they need to feel superior. Nobody can see the apocalypse coming; the very idea is unthinkable.

The Aesthetics of Triumph

Stand those pillars back up. Un-bury those ancient machines. Wind the clock back to a civilization at its height, at the peak of its powers. There might be ruinous bits - slums, chemical waste dumps, wilderness areas - but the core is bright, shining, and new.

This is a bit of a problem for old-school D&D-type games. The tools given to a player are mostly suitable for getting loot from ruined areas, fighting monsters, and generally exploring an uncivilized and wild region. They're great post-apocalyptic tools but, as Joseph says, they aren't useful for fighting a civilization head-on and winning.

So don't fight it head-on. Don't fight it all. In a pre-apocalyptic game, the goal is to move with the current, keep your boat off the rocks, and, if possible, push your competitors into the rapids.

Instead of dungeons, you're raiding the laboratories and warehouses of inventors, or the vaults of banks, or the records of an enemy political faction.

Instead of monsters squatting in the ruins, you're fighting guards, side-effects, specially created tools, and fruits of new and terrible sciences.

Instead of arcane lore and ancient tomes, you're studying periodicals and newspapers and attending lectures.

Instead of preventing the apocalyptic schemes of mad cultists or evil villains, you're preventing the apocalyptic consequences of well-meaning but short-sighted allies, usually by crashing another apocalypse into the first to cancel them out.

And instead of spending your hard-earned money on wine, pleasurable company, powerful drugs, and fancy hats, you're spending it on... well, wine, pleasurable company, powerful drugs, and fancy hats.

Not everything has to be inverted, I guess.

Anthony Devine

The Pace of Life

Ok, ignore all of that. The difference between a pre-apocalyptic setting and a post-apocalpytic one is how people experience fear.

In a post-apocalyptic world, the pace of fear is slow. It's horror, the long game. Running out of food. A noise in the dark signaling invasion and death. Becoming a different person. Bleak caution.

In a pre-apocalyptic game, the pace of fear is fast. It's terror, the short jump scare, except it's a never-ending stream of new sudden shocks. The world is constantly changing and you're being drawn along with it. There are no stable points, no centre, no immutable law or ancient tradition. Excited colourful turbulence and folly. 

The pre-apocalypse is the wild night before the post-apocalyptic hangover.

Gamifying the Whirlwind

So how do you do any of that in an RPG? The human brain can only hold three or four things in focus at once. Just the basic processes of running a game takes up two of those slots. How can I make tools that require minimum brainpower, page-flipping, cross-referencing, and prep, while still providing a wonderful chaotic pre-apocalyptic result?

1. Tools for describing chaos.

Really good encounter tables. High quality, immediately evocative, immediately applicable to the players.

2. Tracking Change

The various inventions and innovations in the book will progress through several stages, from dreams to prototypes to ubiquitous to very dangerous. The book will provide GMs with tools to manage a city changing from horse-drawn carriages to leaping magi-cars, and/or from ineffective police work to constant universal scrying.

3. Pre-Session Checklists
A tool to orient the GM. Where are things at? What's going on in the background? What new innovation is sweeping the city? Basically, while everyone's showing up and taking off their coats, go through a list really quickly.


OSR: Veinscrawl Session 11 & 12

Last session, the party fought a whale and a vampire, lost the goblins, and went slightly mad.

The party consists of:
Cazael the spiderling fighter. Fears magic, prefers a good sword and a simple plan.
Bill the wormling Orthodox Wizard. Has antlers, telekinesis, permanent wizard vision, inability to sleep, magic not-dying amulet, etc. Generally considered a liability.
Swainson the Garden Wizard. Formerly a hawkling, currently a dryad.
Christen Bell the weasel-ling Bell Exorcist. Starting to think this whole underground thing was a bad idea.
Tuck the Flealing Summoner. Suspicious but loyal.

The map has grown so complex that the map-making player has split it into 2 files. Here's the original map (up to Session 8).
 And here's session 9, 10, 11, and 12.
Starting with "The Ambassagater"...

1. The party, recovering from their hallucinations, found themselves on the edge of a great underground chemical lake. They negotiated passage across on slate skiff-boats piloted by myconids.

2. At a fungal village / trading port, the PCs finally encountered something like a civilization. Protected by the myconids, traders from many underground states could meet in relative safety in the centre of the fungid valley. The village contained the semi-permanent embassy of a fungal ambassodile, a two-minded creature full of secrets and schemes. It also contained a Drow silk-merchant.

3. Bill negotiated with the mysterious elf to learn new spells. Tuck, offended by the Drow's aloof and insulting nature, hurled insults of his own. The Drow made most of Tuck's organs fall out. Tuck, annoyed by this, gathered up his still-functional innards and asked the Drow to "fix it". The Drow did. Tuck now loved the Drow. He literally couldn't think badly of them.

4. Meanwhile, Cazael and the rest of the party met with the fungal ambassodile. The strangely charming creature asked them, as independent operatives, to go and sort out a minor problem with a giant magical creature in a lake. If they could kill the creature, they'd earn vast rewards, including a map to the surface.

5. The party also recruited a young woman, Alice, and a mysterious goat, Tom.

6. Their route to the lake passed through the Slime Vortex, a funnel-shaped cave full of spinning slimes. Water flowing into the channel was filtered by the rotating mass of slimes. It was a miracle of nature and a massive obstacle to travel. It was also an excellent source of gold; all the inedible metals sunk to the bottom of the funnel.

7. The gold was far too tempting for Tom the Goat and Bill the Wormling. Together, they descended into the funnel, dodging slimes the whole way. Unfortunately for them, the pool at the bottom of the cave wasn't water at all, but another transparent slime. They were both badly bludgeoned and partially digested.

8. Klaus used his sorcerous powers to part the slimes, altering the funnel's geometry temporarily and allowing for the rescue of Bill, the goat, and a small amount of gold.

9. Tom the goat, who was "really weird", everyone agreed, was in a semi-permanent coma. Alice, his keeper and apprentice witch, decided to take matters into her own hands.

10. After several more adventures, the party finally found the gigantic underground lake at the heart of the fungid valley. They decided to lure the "magic beast" in the lake to shore using a magic battery - stolen from a dEr0 earthquake machine - as bait. 

11. The plan worked, and a horrible insect, with a shell made entirely of magic weapons, lurched from the lake to savage the group. The party's plan hadn't extended beyond luring the beast closer. They immediately panicked.

12. Christen Bell and Swainson were crushed by the beast's magic shell. Mangled beyond recognition, they were left to die on the rocky shore as Cazael and Bill tried to fight the creature. Alice turned into a strange rubbery bird and flew away, shouting "Fuck this, I'm out!". She stopped just long enough to drop the magic battery onto the back of the giant beast.

13. Cazael set the magic battery on fire and, briefly, drove the caddis-fly-thing into the lake. Bill, meanwhile, attempted a radical healing procedure for his two "mostly dead" friends. Sure, Swainson and Christen Bell were dead in the medical sense, but possibly not in the wizardly sense. He stabbed them both with his dagger of roiling polymorph.

14. Christen Bell turned into an octopus and stayed there. Unable to live out of the water, she sadly lurched into the lake.

15. Swainson, on the other hand, polymorphed into a ravenous shadow, then a cave giant. Still disoriented by lurching from splintery death into gigantic life, she spotted the caddis-fly monster charging towards shore. She struck the creature with a mighty blow, tore it apart, and scattered magical implements and gold all over the shore.

16. The dagger was, unfortunately, roiling polymorph. Swainson polymorphed from a giant to a panther, a rhino, a mummy, a brass dragon, a cockatrice, a giant (again!), a squid, a gorilla, and finally, after over an hour of screaming and flopping from form to form, stabilized as a lamassu. While not ideal, a lamassu was hardly the worst thing to be. At least Swainson could speak and move and even cast spells; her new cow-sphinx-lion form would do.

17. With her mind fading fast, octopus-Christen Bell decided to end her life by magic sword. She chopped herself into neat cubes and faded away.

18. Encumbered with thousands of gold pieces and dozens of magic swords, the surviving members of the party lurched away from the magically contaminated lake, leaving entire drifts of swords and gold behind.

Would their hasty actions result in underground warfare? What was the ambassodile's plan? Could they use Swainson's new lamassu powers to escape to the surface or was her mind too badly scrambled by her many transformations?

Find out next time.


OSR: Giant Impractical Table - Of the London Street Folk

This table is too large and too unwieldy to print, but it should work fine on the web.

Anyway, the text is taken from Henry Mayhew's London Labour and the London Poor (1861). It's suitable for livening up a street scene, rolling up a background or a retirement profession, or just reading in awe and bewilderment. If an entry says to "roll twice", roll on the most recent table unless otherwise prompted. I haven't edited the text beyond tabulating it. "Spotted boys", "Sapient Pigs" and other oddities are presented as found. I might do an annotated version one day explaining the stranger entries.

1d20 Of the London Street Folk
1-15 1d10 Street Sellers
1 1d6 The Street-sellers of Meats
1 ”Wet” fish
2 “Dry” fish
3 Shell-fish
4 Poultry
5 Game
6 Cheese
2 1d8 The Street-sellers of Vegetables
1 “Green” fruit
2 “Dry” fruit
3 Flowers
4 Trees and shrubs
5 Seeds and roots
6 Water-cresses
7 Chickweed and grun’sel
8 Turf
3 1d20 The Street-sellers of Eatables
1 Fried fish
2 Hot eels
3 Pickled whelks
4 Sheep’s trotters
5 Ham sandwiches
6 Peas’-soup
7 Hot green peas
8 Penny pies
9 Plum “duff”
10 Meat-puddings
11 Baked potatoes
12 Spice-cakes
13 Muffins and crumpets
14 Chelsea buns
15 Sweetmeats
16 Brandy-balls
17 Cough drops
18 Cat and dog’s meat
19 [roll again twice]
20 [roll again three times]
4 1d10 The Street-sellers of Drinkables
1 Tea
2 Coffee
3 Ginger-beer
4 Lemonade
5 Hot wine
6 New milk from the cow
7 Asses milk
8 Curds and whey
9 Water
10 [roll again twice]
5 1d20 The Street-sellers of Stationery, Literature, and the Fine Arts
1 Flying stationers
2 Standing and running patterers
3 Long-song-sellers
4 Wall-song-sellers (or “pinners-up,” as they are technically termed)
5 Ballad sellers
6 Vendors of play-bills
7 Second editions of newspapers
8 Back numbers of periodicals and old books
9 Almanacks
10 Pocket books
11 Memorandum books
12 Note paper
13 Sealing-wax
14 Pens and Pencils
15 Stenographic cards
16 Valentines
17 Engravings
18 Manuscript music
19 Images
20 Gelatine poetry cards
6 1d6 The Street-sellers of Manufactured Articles
1 1d10 The vendors of chemical articles of manufacture
1 Blacking
2 Lucifers
3 Corn-salves
4 Grease-removing compositions
5 Plating-balls
6 Poison for rats
7 Crackers
8 Detonating-balls
9 Cigar-lights 
10 [roll again twice]
2 1d20 The vendors of metal articles of manufacture
1 Razors and pen-knives
2 Tea-trays
3 Dog-collars
4 Key-rings
5 Hardware
6 Bird-cages
7 Small coins
8 Medals
9 Jewellery
10 Tin-ware
11 Tools
12 Card-counters
13 Red-herring-toasters
14 Trivets
15 Gridirons
16 Dutch ovens
17 [roll again twice]
18 [roll again three times]
19 [roll again, and also on subtable]
20 [roll again, and also on main table]
3 1d6 The vendors of china and stone articles of manufacture
1 Cups and saucers
2 Jugs
3 Vases
4 Chimney ornaments
5 Stone fruit
6 [roll again twice]
4 1d8 The vendors of linen, cotton, and silken articles of manufacture
1 Sheeting
2 Table covers
3 Cotton
4 Tapes and thread
5 Boot and stay-laces
6 Haberdashery
7 Pretended smuggled goods
8 Shirt-buttons
5 1d12 The vendors of miscellaneous articles of manufacture
1 Cigars, pipes, and snuff-boxes
2 Spectacles
3 Combs
4 “Lots”
5 Rhubarb
6 Sponges
7 Wash-leather
8 Paper-hangings
9 Dolls
10 Bristol toys
11 Sawdust
12 Pin-cushions
  6 [roll again twice]
7 1d4 The Street-sellers of Second-hand Articles
1 1d6 Old metal articles
1 Old knives and forks
2 Keys
3 Tin-ware
4 Tools
5 Marine stores generally
6 [roll again twice]
2 Old linen articles
3 1d3 Old glass and crockery
1 Bottles
2 Old pans and pitchers
3 Old looking glasses
4 1d3 Old miscellaneous articles
1 Old shoes
2 Old clothes
3 Old saucepan lids
8 1d6 The Street-sellers of Live Animals
1 Dogs
2 Squirrels
3 Birds
4 Gold and silver fish
5 Tortoises
6 [roll again twice]
9 1d8 The Street-sellers of Mineral Productions and Curiosities
1 Red and white sand
2 Silver sand
3 Coals
4 Coke
5 Salt
6 Spar ornaments
7 Shells
8 [roll again twice]
10 [roll again twice]
16 1d10 Street-Buyers
1 Hareskins
2 Old clothes
3 Old umbrellas
4 Bottles
5 Glass
6 Broken metal
7 Rags
8 Waste paper
9 Dripping
10 [roll again twice]
17 1d6 Street-Finders
1 Dogs’-dung
2 Cigar-ends
3 Dredgermen or coal-finders
4 Mud-larks
5 Bone-grubbers
6 Sewer-hunters
18 1d8 Street-Performers, Artists, and Showmen
1 1d4 The Street-Performers
1 1d3 Mountebanks—or those who enact puppet-shows
1 Punch and Judy
2 Fantoccini
3 Chinese shades
2 1d10 Street-performers of feats of strength and dexterity
1 “Acrobats” or posturers
2 “Equilibrists” or balancers
3 Stiff tumblers 
4 Bending tumblers
5 Jugglers
6 Conjurors
7 Sword-swallowers
8 “Salamanders” or fire-eaters
9 Swordsmen
10 [roll again twice]
3 1d10 Street-performers with trained animals
1 Dancing dogs
2 Performing monkeys
3 Trained birds 
4 Trained mice
5 Cats
6 Hares
7 Sapient pigs
8 Dancing bears
9 Tame camels
10 [roll again twice]
4 1d3 Street-actors
1 Clowns
2 “Billy Barlows”
3 “Jim Crows”
2 1d6 The Street Showmen
1 1d6 Extraordinary persons
1 Giants
2 Dwarfs
3 Albinoes
4 Spotted boys
5 Pig-faced ladies
6 [reroll]
2 1d4 Extraordinary animals
1 Alligators
2 Calves, horses and pigs with six legs or two heads
3 Industrious fleas
4 Happy families
3 1d3 Philosophic instruments
1 The microscope
2 The telescope
3 The thaumascope
4 1d4 Measuring-machines
1 Weighing
2 Lifting
3 Measuring
4 Striking machines
5 1d6 Miscellaneous shows
1 Peep-shows
2 Glass ships
3 Mechanical figures
4 Wax-work shows
5 Pugilistic shows
6 Fortune-telling apparatus
6 [roll again twice]
3 1d6 The Street-Artists
1 Black profile-cutters
2 Blind paper-cutters
3 “Screevers” or draughtsmen in coloured chalks on the pavement
4 Writers without hands
5 Readers without eyes
6 [roll again twice]
4 1d6 The Street Dancers
1 Street Scotch girls
2 Sailors
3 Slack rope dancers
4 Tight rope dancers
5 Dancers on stilts
6 Comic dancers
5 1d6 The Street Musicians
1 English street bands
2 German street bands
  (Players of the) 
3 Guitar
4 Harp
5 Bagpipes
6 Hurdy-gurdy
7 Dulcimer
8 Musical bells
9 Cornet
10 Tom-tom
6 1d10 The Street Singers
  (Singers of)
1 Glees
2 Ballads
3 Comic
4 Songs
5 Nigger melodies
6 Psalms
7 Serenaders
8 Reciters
9 Improvisatori
10 [roll again twice]
7 1d10 The Proprietors of Street Games
1 Swings
2 Highflyers
3 Roundabouts
4 Puff-and-darts
5 Rifle shooting
6 Down the dolly
7 Spin-’em-rounds
8 Prick the garter
9 Thimble-rig
10 [roll again twice]
8 [roll again twice]
19 1d3 The Street-Artizans, or Working Pedlars
1 1d3 Those who make things in the streets
1 1d4 Metal workers
1 Toasting-fork makers
2 Pin makers
3 Engravers
4 Tobacco-stopper makers
2 1d4 Textile-workers
1 Stocking-weavers
2 Cabbage-net makers
3 Night-cap knitters
4 Doll-dress knitters
3 1d4 Miscellaneous workers
1 Wooden spoon makers
2 Leather brace and garter makers
3 Printers
4 Glass-blowers
2 1d8 Those who mend things in the streets
1 Broken china and glass menders
2 Clock menders
3 Umbrella menders
4 Kettle menders
5 Chair menders
6 Grease removers
7 Hat cleaners
8 Razor and knife grinders
9 Glaziers
10 Travelling bell hangers
11 Knife cleaners
12 [roll again twice]
3 1d6 Those who make things at home and sell them in the streets
1 1d20 The wood workers
1 Makers of clothes-pegs
2 Clothes-props
3 Skewers
4 Needle-cases
5 Foot-stools
6 Clothes-horses
7 Chairs and tables
8 Tea-caddies
9 Writing-desks
10 Drawers
11 Work-boxes
12 Dressing-cases
13 Pails and tubs
14 The trunk, hat, and bonnet-box makers
15 The cane and rush basket makers
16 [roll again twice]
17 [roll again three times]
18 [roll again, and also on subtable]
19 [roll again, and also on main table]
20 [roll again twice, and also on main table]
2 1d12 The toy makers
1 Chinese roarers
2 Children’s windmills
3 Flying birds and fishes
4 Feathered cocks
5 Black velvet cats and sweeps
6 Paper houses and cardboard carriages
7 Little copper pans and kettles
8 Tiny tin fireplaces
9 Children’s watches
10 Dutch dolls
11 Buy-a-brooms
12 Gutta-percha heads
3 1d10 The apparel makers
1 The makers of women’s caps
2 Boys and men’s cloth caps
3 Night-caps
4 Straw bonnets
5 Children’s dresses
6 Watch-pockets
7 Bonnet shapes
8 Silk bonnets
9 Gaiters
10 [roll again twice]
4 1d3 The metal workers
1 Makers of fire-guards
2 Bird-cages
3 The wire workers
5 1d12 The miscellaneous workers
1 Makers of ornaments for stoves
2 Chimney ornaments
3 Artificial flowers in pots and in nose-gays
4 Plaster-of-Paris night-shades
5 Brooms
6 Brushes
7 Mats
8 Rugs
9 Hearthstones
10 Firewood
11 Rush matting
12 Hassocks
6 [roll again twice]
20 1d4 Street-Labourers
1 1d8 The Cleansers
1 Scavengers
2 Nightmen
3 Flushermen
4 Chimney-sweeps
5 Dustmen
6 Crossing-sweepers
7 “Street-orderlies”
8 Labourers to sweeping-machines and to watering-carts
2 1d2 The Lighters and Waterers
1 Turncocks 
2 Lamplighters
3 1d6 The Street-Advertisers
1 Bill-stickers
2 Bill-deliverers
3 Boardmen
4 Men to advertising vans
5 Wall and pavement stencillers
6 [roll again twice]
4 1d4 The Street-Servants
1 Horse holders
2 Link-men
3 Coach-hirers
4 Street-porters
5 Shoe-blacks
6 [roll again twice]