OSR: Horrible Burgher NPC Generator

Burghers are town-folk; members of the third estate who live and work in towns or cities. Some are richer than any lord. Some are more wretched than any rural peasant. Medieval urban centres were deathtraps. Mortality rates far exceeded birth rates.* Higher wages, greater security, and a greater availability of goods and luxuries drew new arrivals into cities.
*Infant mortality and plagues were the main contributing factors. If you made it to 20 in a city, you were nearly as likely as someone in the country to make it to 50.

Boccaccio, Des cas de nobles hommes et femmes (French version of De Casibus), France c. 1470

1d100	First Name	Profession	Guild?	Demeanour
1	Richard	Alchemist		Devout
2	Richard	Apothecary		Devout
3	Charles	Architect	G	Devout
4	Charles	Banker	G	Devout
5	Louis	Bookbinder	G	Devout
6	Louis	Bureaucrat		Devout
7	Robert	Chirurgeon		Devout
8	Robert	Clock-maker	G	Devout
9	William	Engineer	G	Devout
10	William	Falconer		Devout
11	John	Goldsmith	G	Stoic
12	John	Herbalist		Stoic
13	John	Illustrator		Stoic
14	Claude	Land-merchant	G	Stoic
15	Thomas	Lawyer		Stoic
16	Adam	Poet		Stoic
17	Jean	Sea-merchant	G	Stoic
18	Hugh	Spice-merchant	G	Stoic
19	Joseph	Storyteller		Stoic
20	Michael	Tax Collector		Stoic
21	Raymond	Armourer	G	Ruthless
22	Roland	Astrologer		Ruthless
23	Matthew	Bag-maker	G	Ruthless
24	Gilles	Baker	G	Ruthless
25	George	Barber-Surgeon		Ruthless
26	Greggory	Basket-maker	G	Ruthless
27	Edmund	Belt-maker	G	Pragmatic
28	Phillip	Blacksmith	G	Pragmatic
29	Geoffrey	Brewer	G	Pragmatic
30	Henry	Bridle-maker	G	Pragmatic
31	Gadifer	Bronze-caster	G	Hopeless
32	Oliver	Broom-maker	G	Hopeless
33	Stephen	Butcher	G	Hopeless
34	Andrew	Carder	G	Hopeless
35	Huguet	Carpenter	G	Hopeless
36	Francis	Cartwright	G	Hopeless
37	Peter	Chandler	G	Hopeless
38	James	Cheese-maker	G	Hopeless
39	Gilbert	Clerk		Hopeless
40	Arthur	Cobbler	G	Hopeless
41	Jules	Cook		Lazy
42	Andre	Cooper	G	Lazy
43	Jerome	Copyist		Lazy
44	Guy	Debt Collector		Lazy
45	Jacob	Dyer	G	Lazy
46	Isaac	Embroiderer		Gluttonous
47	Mark	Farrier	G	Lustful
48	Nicholas	Felt-maker	G	Greedy
49	Victor	Fishmonger		Prideful
50	Roman	Fletcher	G	Slothful
51	Alice	Furbisher	G	Wrathful
52	Alice	Furrier	G	Envious
53	Joan	Gambler		Incompetent
54	Joan	Glassmaker	G	Blasphemous
55	Agnes	Glove-maker	G	Petty
56	Agnes	Goatherd		Ambitious
57	Margery	Gongfarmer	G	Ambitious
58	Margery	Gravedigger		Ambitious
59	Isabel	Hat-maker		Ambitious
60	Isabel	Inn-keeper	G	Ambitious
61	Mary	Jailer		Ignorant
62	Mary	Jeweler	G	Ignorant
63	Mary	Leatherworker	G	Ignorant
64	Mary	Locksmith		Ignorant
65	Margaret	Mason	G	Ignorant
66	Emma	Mercer	G	Diseased
67	Juliana	Miller	G	Diseased
68	Christine	Minstrel	G	Diseased
69	Katherine	Miracle Play Actor	G	Diseased
70	Beatrice	Needlemaker	G	Diseased
71	Elizabeth	Lead Servant		Skeptical
72	Ellen	Ointment-maker		Skeptical
73	Mary	Pack Handler	G	Skeptical
74	Amice	Painter	G	Skeptical
75	Sibilla	Parchment-maker	G	Skeptical
76	Cecily	Pewterer		Frantic
77	Sara	Plasterer	G	Frantic
78	Avice	Porter	G	Frantic
79	Isolda	Potter	G	Frantic
80	Lucy	Poultry-keeper		Frantic
81	Mariota	Rat Catcher		Frantic
82	Ann	Rope-maker	G	Frantic
83	Annabel	Salter	G	Frantic
84	Anastasia	Scullion		Frantic
85	Avelina	Sculptor	G	Frantic
86	Letitia	Servant (Domestic)		Surly
87	Agatha	Servant (Military)		Surly
88	Eustacia	Shipwright	G	Surly
89	Sabrina	Siege Engineer		Surly
90	Susanna	Stonecutter	G	Surly
91	Andrea	Swineherd		Surly
92	Anna	Tailor	G	Surly
93	Bianca	Tanner	G	Surly
94	Colette	Thatcher	G	Surly
95	Flo	Toll-keeper		Surly
96	Lucia	Weaponsmith	G	Rebellious
97	Goody	Weaver	G	Rebellious
98	Charity	Woodcarver	G	Rebellious
99	Faith	Woodcutter	G	Rebellious
100	Hope	Woolwinder	G	Rebellious

Generally, membership in a guild was limited to men, but every system has an exception, and the sources sometimes show guildmaster's wives giving wise advice, interfering, supporting, or occasionally wreaking havoc.

1d10	Guild Troubles
1	Supplies of a vital material or resource are running low.
2	The treasurer absconded with the guild's savings.
3	Feud with a rival guild is nearing a bloody climax.
4	Desperate drive to recruit new members.
5	Preparations for an annual procession paralyze guild.
6	Factions within the guild fight for power and control.
7	Disaster cripples both guild members and guild finances.
8	Guild has earned the wrath of local rulers.
9	Rival town seeks to undermine and bankrupt guild.
10	The lower ranks of the guild are in open revolt.

Bible Historiée, France c. 1250

Quotes

Concentration of wealth was moving upward in the 14th century and enlarging the proportion of the poor, while the catastrophes of the century reduced large numbers to misery and want. The poor had remained manageable as long as their minimum subsistence could be maintained by charity, but the situation changed when urban populations were swelled by the flotsam of war and plague and infused by a new aggressiveness in the plague’s wake.

As the masters became richer, the workers sank to the level of day labor, with little prospect of advancement. Membership in the guilds was shut off to the ordinary journeyman and reserved under complicated requirements and fees for sons and relatives of the master class. In many trades, work was farmed out to workers in their homes, often at lower wages to their wives and children, whose employment was forbidden in the guilds. Obligatory religious holidays, which numbered 120 to 150 a year, kept earnings down. Although forbidden to strike and, in some towns, to assemble, workers formed associations of their own to press for higher wages. They had their own dues and treasuries and connections across frontiers through which jobs and lodgings could be secured for members, and which doubtless served as channels of agitation.

[...]

They worked at fixed wages, often below subsistence level, for sixteen to eighteen hours a day, and their wages might be withheld to cover waste or damage to raw materials. The alliance of the Church with the great was plain enough in a bishop’s pastoral letter declaring that spinners could be excommunicated for wasting their wool. Workers could be flogged or imprisoned or suffer removal from the list of employables or have a hand cut off for resistance to employers. Agitators for the right to organize could be hung, and in 1345 ten wool-carders had been put to death on this charge.

-A Distant Mirror, Tuchman



Naturally the merchants, whose rise preceded the coming of industries to Siena, lead the way in the formation of a general society planned to protect their common interests... But the crafts were not slow to follow suit, and presently the masons, carpenters, inn-keepers, barbers, butchers, millers, and other classes of workmen and artisans were organized as arti, with the usual apparatus of constitution, officers, regulations, prohibitions, and fines... Among many excellent regulations which concerned themselves with obtaining for the consumer a full measure and an honest product, were to be found others which, by paralyzing the free activities of the workers, must have caused grave harm. Thus the statues of the wool guild required that only one pieces of cloth be woven at a time, that it be neither longer nor shorter than a certain standard, and that only native wool be put on the looms; and all guilds alike pursued a selfishly exclusive policy, imposing a heavy tax on all candidates for admission, and positively forbidding the exercise of their respective occupation to all but guild members in good standing. Add minute regulations regarding the hours and quantity of labour and the observation of so many church festivals that about one hundred and thirty days of the calendar year were devoted to enforced rest, and we get some idea of the mischievousness of that spirit of over-regulation which characterized both the guilds and the government.

[...]

The proletariat of [the wool] industry, concentrated largely in the quarter of Ovile, numbered several thousands. In the recurrent periods of industrial depression or in time of high bread prices, their condition must have been terrible. That they organized in 1371 and sought redress by violence proves that they were growing desperate; decimated for their pains by a cowardly massacre... they and other workingmen of a too independent leaning were expelled, to the number of four thousand, from the city. This almost ludicrous act of party fury may be taken to mark the end in Siena of capitalistic production on a large scale.

-Siena, Ferdinand Schevill

Other Useful Tables

Horrible Peasant NPC Generator  
1d100 Peasant Grievances  
Horrible Baron NPC Generator
1d100 Baronial Grievances
If you want a more refined sort of person, from a different age, try the Dickensian NPC Generator. If not, try the Table of Camp Followers.

OSR: Elsewhere Creatures and Elsewhere Rifts

There are three types of teleport spells. The first, the False Teleport, transforms the caster into a cloud of smoke, a tiny insect, or a floating spark. It’s used for short jaunts of 100’ or less. All transformative magic has risks, but the False Teleport’s short duration makes it relatively safe.

The second type, the Reciprocal Teleport, exchanges the caster and an approximately equal mass of air or stone at the destination. Safe range is a few miles. Botched Reciprocal Teleports lead to tales of wizards embedded in stone, split neatly in half, or dropped from great heights.

The third type, the True Teleport, has effectively unlimited range. The caster is “folded Elsewhere”. They vanish with a warp and a thunderclap of displaced air and, almost immediately, unfold at their destination. Sometimes, a little too frequently for comfort, the caster fails to reappear or emerges mangled and torn by unseen forces. Outside of Dread Necromancy, True Teleportation has the greatest number of cautionary tales attached to it. Merely memorizing a teleport spell is risky. A botched fireball might melt your earwax and painfully scorch your sinuses, but an accidentally triggered teleport can launch your prefrontal cortex into the air.


Even worse, creatures from Elsewhere sometimes slip back into our world.

Aexion

Elsewhere Creatures

# Appearing: □ 1 □ □ 1d6 □ □ □ 2d6. (□ = tempo). Can be all of the same type or all different types.


The HD, Appearance, Voice, Move, and Damage of Elsewhere Creatures varies widely. See the Tables below.

Wants: completely inscrutable. To observe, to devour, to change, to freeze; who can say?

Morality: none detectable.

Intelligence: mechanical.


Move: equivalent to fly normal. 

Morale: 12

 or 1d12 or 2d6.

Elsewhere Creatures come from... Elsewhere. Other worlds, other dimensions, other planes; it’s unclear and a topic of wild speculation among fringe wizards. Classification is nearly impossible. They might be seed pods, angels, exploratory ships, or blind rampaging animals. They don’t obey local physical laws.

Sorry for the images. I usually prefer to post text, but it seems blogger doesn't like my formatting right now. Oh well.

Astronomers Bartholomeus Anglicus, ‘Livre des propriétés des choses’ (‘De proprietatibus rerum’, French translation of Jean Corbechon), Bruges ca. 1470 BnF, Français 134, fol. 169r

Elsewhere Rifts

Elsewhere Rifts are portals to other worlds. They are typically ringed with white fog and octarine sparks. Creatures and objects can pass through a rift, though the world on the other side may be hazardous, toxic, or actively hostile. There’s a rubbery forcefield across a rift. Objects require a little push to enter or exit.



Portals remain stable for  □ 1 hour □ □ 1d6 hours □ □ □ 1d6 days. Exploring the “other side” is possible and occasionally rewarding. It can also strand explorers.


 Read straight across for “sensible” rifts or roll for each column (6x d10s) for more unusual and esoteric worlds.

Igor Vitkovskiy

PDF Version

This post is also available as a fancy PDF. This content (after editing and additional playesting) will appear in Magical Industrial Revolution, but it might be useful right now for your games.

Aexion

I've tried to make a truly alien creature and environment generator that can still be used at the table. I don't expect it to be used every session, so I've tried to make it as compact as possible while still providing plenty of inspiration and flavor.

Horrible Baron NPC Generator

Other useful articles:
Horrible Peasant NPC Generator 1d100 Peasant Grievances 1d50 Reasons the Peasants are Revolting If you want a more refined sort of person, from a different age, try the Dickensian NPC Generator

The PCs need to pay taxes to someone, and most of the time, that's a baron. Local warlords given legitimacy and power, barons form the lower part of the upper Third Estate. They are supported by scores of local knights, landowners, and other members of the Third Estate, while facing constant pressure from their Count, Duke, or the Monarch directly. Barons have last names based on their barony's name. They are rarely referred to by their first names. This table is designed for a society of male landowners and their male heirs. Adjust as needed for your setting. 

Veteran Soldier, Dimlife

Roll as many times as you need to on each table, ignoring or adapting incompatible results.

	First Name	Appearance	Dress, Style, and Other Information
1	Charles	blubber lips	keeps a whispering advisor close at hand
2	Charles	deep, booming voice	new, fur-lined robes
3	Charles	languid, calm speech	magnificent scarlet robes
4	Charles	rolling gait	thin, worn robes
5	Charles	pig-like nose	fashionable boots
6	Louis	extraordinarily huge scar	always has a trio of priests in the background
7	Louis	tufts of irregular hair	breeds peerless horses
8	Louis	slab-faced	drinks and eats constantly
9	Louis	extraordinarily crooked nose	fingers coated in rings
10	Louis	one dense eyebrow	long, winding, gold and silver chains
11	Robert	half-asleep	incomparable court musicians
12	Robert	ragged, patchy facial hair	wise court physician
13	Robert	extraordinary compressed	terrifying court wizard
14	Robert	lazy to a fault	accurate court astrologer
15	Robert	vein-coated neck	rumours of spies and spymasters
16	John	wild, tangled hair	hunting hawks beyond compare
17	John	terrifying laugh	unusual hunting hounds
18	John	prominent, angular chin	well-trained hunting hounds
19	John	oddly effeminate	unusual creature or monster as a pet/captive
20	John	hideous grin and winking eyes	hilarious, wise, truth-to-power-speaking jester
21	Claude	surprisingly young	so-bad-it's-almost-funny jester
22	William	permanent grimmace	beautiful tapestries
23	Alexis	astonishingly old	worn, threadbare tapestries
24	Jean	irregular, yellow teeth	silks from Foreign Parts
25	Rene	little goggling eyes	trinkets from Foreign Parts
26	Joseph	crooked back	minor magical item
27	Michael	flat, pancake face	magic sword or shield
28	Raymond	waddling gait	an extensive library of 2d6 books
29	Roland	prominent mole or boil	dozens of well-trained servants
30	Constant	widely set eyes	very few, surly servants
31	Gilles	missing fingers	suspicious, whispering servants
32	George	unusually large head	servants clearly chosen for their looks, not competence
33	Ingleram	sagging lips	silver bowls, cups, and trays
34	Owain	flicking tongue, cracked lips	life-like wood carvings
35	Phillip	squat, short body	immaculate hair, skin, and clothes
36	Geoffrey	hissing, raspy voice	stained, scarred, and well-used clothes
37	Henry	stump-fingered	half-collapsed manor
38	Gadifer	no chin at all	large, well-stocked manor
39	Olivier	sweats profusely	fortified manor
40	Pierre	potato-shaped nose	sprawling, decrepit manor
41	Yvain	smiling, open face	manor built on the ruins of an ancient settlement
42	Huguet	almost bald	spindly lookout tower on a nearby hill
43	Francis	vein-coated neck	garlands of honour won at tournaments
44	Peter	small, tightly pursed mouth	disproportionately large kitchens
45	Luc	loose skin	religious icons in private chapel
46	Gilbert	long, greasy beard	a truly ancient family crest or shield
47	Arthur	stiff as a board	famous local hero buried in crypt
48	Jules	thin like a reed	indoor plumbing (cold water only)
49	Andre	carbuncle	many glass windows
50	Jerome	furious eyes	extensive orchard or personal garden

Plantagenet Family Portrait, Hark, a Vagrant.

Roll a few d50 times, or roll 1d20, 20+1d20 and 40+1d10

	Family
1	wife, young and beautiful
2	wife, young, beautiful, and deeply bored
3	wife, haggard and disreputable
4	wife, plain, extremely wise
5	wife, plain, heart of iron, really the one in charge
6	wife, lingering illness, rarely seen
7	wife, secretly a spellcaster
8	wife, very literate, of better stock than her husband
9	wife, cunning and treacherous
10	wife, devout, stoic, and well-educated
11	no wife (widowed, heartbroken)
12	no wife (widowed, too busy or old to bother)
13	no wife (widowed, vengeful)
14	no wife (desires a match to raise his status)
15	no wife (previous marriage annulled)
16	heir, infant, fragile. 1d4 years old.
17	heir, sickly. 1d10 years old.
18	heir, comically stocky. 1d10 years old.
19	heir, sly. 1d10+5 years old.
20	heir, lazy and languid. 1d10+5 years old.
21	heir, idiotic but loved. 1d10+10 years old.
22	heir, uncertain and doubtful. 1d10+10 years old.
23	heir, depraved. 1d10+15 years old.
24	heir, stoic and sensible. 1d10+15 years old.
25	heir, rebellious and covetous. 1d10+15 years old.
26	no heir (recently died)
27	no heir (exiled)
28	no heir (disowned)
29	no heir (died bravely in battle)
30	no heir (died of a terrible illness)
31	heir, infant, 1d4 years old, plus 1d4 other infant children.
32	heir, infant, 1d4 years old, plus 1d4 older female children.
33	heir, infant, 1d4 years old, plus 1d4 older male illegitimate children.
34	heir, infant, 1d4 years old, 2d10 scattered illegitimate children.
35	heir, infant, 1d4 years old, plus 1 much older male illegitimate child.
36	1 female child, studious, 1d10+5 years old.
37	1 female child, spoiled, 1d10+5 years old.
38	1 female child, bored, 1d10+5 years old.
39	1 female child, cruel and malicious, 1d10+10 years old.
40	1 female child, needs to marry, 1d10+15 years old.
41	1d4+1 female children, feuding.
42	1d4+1 female children, painfully religious.
43	1 illegitimate child, raised in the household.
44	1 illegitimate child, nearby but not loved, striking resemblance.
45	1 illegitimate child, scheming furiously, will recruit PCs.
46	1d10 illegitimate children (by reputable mistress)
47	1d10 illegitimate children (by disreputable mistress)
48	2d10 illegitimate children (by anyone, really)
49	2d10+2 squabbling children of all ages and legitimacies. Madness.
50	3d10+2 squabbling children of all ages and legitimacies. Utter disaster.

Battle of Bouvines, Horace Verne

EDIT: Also, this table is very good.